If you know me, you know I’m an extrovert, and my calendar is always full. I can hardly keep up with my own self. Then this comes. This sudden stop to my life as I’ve known it. It’s like God is saying to me, "no more ... settle down. It’s just you and me now." He is bringing me back to the basics of my relationship with Him. I’m sure He is doing the same with many of us. I’m crying out for a fresh visitation of the Father’s Love. I’m soaking up the words of Jesus in the gospels and the words in worship songs. I’m sometimes trying to just get that one word I can hang onto each day. And sometimes each day isn’t enough: sometimes it’s like every couple of hours I need something to carry me through.
It’s all so beautiful and yet still so hard to keep going sometimes.
I participate in the Chicago Unite at Night Event, which is a time every night when people in the high rises go onto their balconies and play the same song and dance and do light shows to connect with each other and give a shout out to the super heroes of the medical field. One day I was alone and I was out on my balcony playing the song "I will survive" by Gloria Gayner and dancing around and I started to cry and say but will I? Will I survive this? I had to stop and come inside as the tears were coming down my face. Yet In the middle of it all, He keeps promising to be right there with me - He wants to be close to me. Bits and pieces from Psalm 139 have been reassuring to me –
He knows when I sit and rise
He is familiar with all my ways
He hems me in –
He lays his hand on me
His right hand will hold me
His eyes saw my unformed body.
He himself knit me together.
He has been and will be intimately involved in my life all the time, whether I realize it or not. Let’s hang on to this together during our time of shelter in place.